Ways to Gain Self Confidence
People who lack self-confidence often feel its absence far more than others realize. It makes social interaction far more difficult, reduces opportunities at work and compounds existing fears of failure or inadequacy.
In most cases, someone with low self-confidence simply doesn’t look at himself with objective eyes. The trick to improving one’s self-confidence is to acknowledge existing assets and translate that knowledge into viable social presentation.
Self confidence begins with an honest and faithful assessment of your skills and abilities. Take stock of the things you enjoy and which you are good at. Remember the times in the past when you excelled at them and they made you happy. Think of ways in which you can capitalize on your abilities and how you can present them in a contextually appropriate way when dealing with others.
At the same time, forgive yourself for your human flaws and imperfections, and cut yourself some slack during those moments when you make mistakes. Nobody’s perfect and everyone commits errors every now and then. By balancing compassion for your shortcomings with belief in your strengths, your self confidence can improve by leaps and bounds.
When seeking to improve self-confidence, pay careful attention to the way you present yourself to others. Smile when talking to other people and always make eye contact. By holding their attention instead of looking away, you project an image of assurance. Shake their hand firmly when they say hello, and hold your head up while you speak.
Do the same thing when you walk and move, straightening up and holding your chin at a slightly upward angle. You should do this even if you don’t feel confident at all; indeed, practice smiling and moving with confidence during periods when you feel low. The more you practice it, the easier it becomes, and as people perceive that confidence, it will translate into more concrete positive emotions.
If you believe in yourself, your self-confidence cannot help but improve. That belief entails an awareness of your inner voice–the way you talk to yourself and the effect it has on your mood. Learn to spot those moments when you jump all over yourself, and short circuit that process by providing compelling counterarguments to your negative thoughts.
Give yourself a pat on the back when you need it, instead of berating yourself when you slip up. Use logic and rationality to show how ridiculous your self-condemnations can be, and point out all the good things you do whenever you need reminding. Changing your inner voice isn’t easy, but by becoming aware of it and noticing the changes it makes in your mood, you can replace it with a gentler and more loving attitude towards yourself.
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